Just the Average Thor's Day Here

 

Page 284 of 366. Good Morning Lovies.  I hope that good health has greeted you this morning. The topic of this entry is going to be one on the fly because it is a completely different one from what I wrote yesterday... that one, as per usual, is my opinion, and it has not changed. 

I do stand tall in my convictions... I am always open to hearing other people's views, as long as they come and speak to me respectfully and open-minded... if you're only coming at me to bitch or TRY to tell me, I am wrong, without coming with factual information... don't bother!!! 

I am a chick with a massive heart. I love wholly and completely; but by being like that my whole life, I have also learned who truly deserves that love and who doesn't deserve sympathy, nor empathy from this woman!!! That being said... here is today's entry...

Yesterday, I was sitting with my sister and "Ma" and the topic about our health and what we have endured. The whole thing came up because I was trying to demonstrate how messed up our medical system was. On the same app that hospitals all across the province we live in, they will show my allergies, but some show my reactions and others just say I have allergies; which means they still ask me what causes what to me... so what happens if I end up in the ER and I am unconscious??? 

Anyways, that's not what ended up being our discussion.

When we came to the list of all my medical conditions, it blew even my mind to see all of them written down in one spot. The first thing that came out of my mouth after that was "HOLY FUCK!!!" and "I am sure there were people who thought I was a HYPOCHONDRIAC, but here is the proof in black and white on the medical page of the professionals of all the hospitals." Even knowing what I, myself, have been through all these years, and the conditions I deal with on the daily... it struck me HARDCORE!!!

My sister looked at me (I won't divulge her personal info but let's say she is on the same "playing field" as me when it comes to medical conditions and health (not that it is a competition)...), and said, "There is no way either one of us should be alive and yet here we are showing the medical professionals that we are, and there is no explanation why. My only response was, "If people suffered even a millionth of what I go through, they'd be dead..." It was an "off" comment, but one that was profound too. It reminded me of the line I like to say...

VICTIM TO SURVIVOR TO WARRIOR!!!

To some, this may sound funny, but some of the best hospitals in this province, with the most advance technology and equipment cannot understand how I am still walking, talking, let alone breathing or even moving... but I am!!! 

They often say they need to call "Dr House MD" because I am definitely the "Mystery Patient". You know, that was funny the first few times I heard it... It's not funny anymore, especially when they are speaking about my own health and life.

I guess this my rant of the day. My only piece of advice I'd like to share is... people need to understand that not all disabilities are visible. Not all people's pain tolerance is the same... in fact, some of us have such a high pain threshhold that we no longer bother saying how much we hurt because there is no number scale that can explain it. 

Others are just fed up on trying to tell anyone because we feel like we are being a burden, or in medical settings we are viewed as "feens" because we need such a high dose of pain meds or we know exactly what we need to ease it even a little; which would be doses that would knock out horses or even elephants, at this point. 

Any way you look at it, it's a catch-22 for those of us who deal with this level of pain or chronic pain... medical professionals don't want to hear it because there are so many addicts nowadays, so when you go to the ER, they are reluctant to give any type of meds (even when you ask them specifically for a non-narcotic); and our loved ones are fed up with hearing about it, because they don't live with the same pain nor understand how real it is.

Just know, I am not writing this looking for sympathy because we all know what my opinion is on sympathy. I write this so people can be more aware of their surroundings and the people within them. If someone comes to tell you about their pain, they aren't coming to complain nor whine; usually they are coming to you simply because they want to be HEARD!!! 

Think about it. Stay safe. Be well. Be blessed.

~Phoenix