Don't Call Me "Yours"

 

Page 162 of 365.

Good Afternoon Lovies. I had to take a few days to myself before I could get behind the keyboard and attempt to put into words how my past week has been. 

It has not been an easy one when it comes to emotions... my mental health took a serious dive; and my fibro has me in a major flare up... other than that, life is peaches!!!

The first stab came when, (read my May 15th entry called "We Want Your Thoughts!!!") I called my dad for Father's Day., and as you can already guess... my mother picked up the phone. I kinda knew something was up because my dad would have definitely answered, knowing it was Father's Day, and I didn't want to talk to that wench.

It was almost like I could hear the smirk on her face as she told me he was in bed, because he wasn't feeling good. My dumb ass asked about the surgery and what had they decided. She told me he had the surgery, and has been sick ever since. I snapped!!! I don't know why I ever expect anything different; but that hit me hard. I literally asked why wasn't I told. 

Why ask for my opinion on all of this, only to go do it and not tell me his decision nor the outcome. LIKE WOULD THEY HAVE EVEN BOTHERED TO TELL ME IF HE HAD FKN DIED??? She told me that she texted me. I had enough. I screenshot the messages we had and sent them to her, showing the last thing was me asking them what had they decided and how was my dad feeling. You want to know what her response was??? I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU!!! I messaged them back and told them to just be with the kids they actually care about and don't bother with me anymore.

As if that wasn't a hard enough kick to my heart... here's the second one... a much more intricate and frustrating one... Sorry, I am going to have to make this a 2 part entry... too much to write in one blurb

~ Phoenix

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