Ramblings of a Canadian Gypsy Phoenix

  Page 198 of 365. Good Afternoon Lovies. Happy Thor's Day!!! I hope you all are doing well. It's been a "rough" couple weeks, I am not gonna lie.  This recent full moon really threw me for a loop... The first one in a very long time; oddly it affected sooooo many people I know. It wasn't just the full moon, it's those pesky planets... six were in alignment, and right after the Buck moon, there were 7... Holy Hannah!!! I honestly think, this is the first day in a very long time I can take a full breathe and know that things are okay. Today is just a day of peace. I don't like that I have been neglecting my writing because it's the only therapy that seems to really work for my soul.  I haven't been doing my crime blog at all.... which frustrates me, because it's one thing that fascinates me. I love diving into the "behind the scenes"... the mind behind the crime, the forensics, the trial, etc.; but more often than not, I am displeased ...

  Page 196 of 365. Good Afternoon Lovies. I cannot believe how much I have been slacking on my writing, especially when I have soooooo much stuff to talk about... I have mentioned how we are having all kinds of extreme weather lately, and the cases of flooding has been insane. Most of the people I know, see this as a distraction to what is really happening in the world... I tend to agree; but it seems others are not ready to hear it. It's honestly like the deaf are leading the blind 🙈🙉🙊 On a more personal level the past week has been more of a whirlwind than anything. I am not going to write about some of the incidences because some people just don't deserve my energy. The only thing I am going to say about the situation is this... for all the people involved, my loyalty is with one person, and one person only. This is where your first mistake was. People lie. People are users and people are abusers. The one thing people don't understand is you don't turn your back o...

Page 190 of 365. Good Afternoon Lovies. I know. I know. I keep saying I am going to keep up on my writing, then I get distracting by life, or my health forces me to put this aside for a while. It sucks, but it is my reality! The weather continues to be as rude as ever... the world continues to be struck with misfortune; whether it be "natural" disasters, explosions or accidents; everyone is dealing with one thing or another.  These are definitely trying times with many people on edge, most of the time. Something has got to give... and SOON! I don't want to make this blurb about my health today... I want to put out all my love, thoughts and positive vibes to everyone who is suffering today. I am thinking of all the people affected by this unprecedented flooding happening.  (Sorry, you can NOT tell me, this is natural. I don't buy it!!!) Chicago is being hit right now with torrential rains. Streets have become rivers with a deluge of five inches of rain in the span of a...

  Page 183 of 365.  Good Afternoon Lovies. How are you all doing, now that summer is officially in full swing? I have been faring pretty well, at least until today. I woke up feeling lethargic, so it wasn't a fun morning; then I had a "mini" seizure...  I say "mini" because it didn't last long, and it was a focal awareness seizure. Quite simply put, I have these seizures quite often, I don't usually have twitching or tremors, although I DO get those every so often. I end up staring off in space, so to speak.  I am most of the time, fully aware of what is going on around me; but I am not able to speak, or properly communicate for the duration of the seizure and for a while afterwards... other times, I have them and am completely unaware of it. I won't remember having one, and my memory loss will be very bad at that time.  Those who are around me will be able to notice if I have had them in my sleep because I will be stuttering, and struggling for word...

  Page 168 of 365. Good Afternoon Lovies. How goes it? It's FriYay!!! What are you all up to this weekend??? I know the CFL (Canadian Football League aka Children's Football League (JK) season has begun... time to piss off my neighbours and hang up my team's flag...  FYI my team is the "mortal enemy" of the team for the city I live in!!! LOL I gotta say, the weather outside is "rude" again. It is supposed to rain overnight, and I am tempted to sleep on my balcony. Life has been fairly quiet today. We managed to get the balcony clean, my zero gravity chair is set up, and laying on that is like heaven, especially when I am in pain. Pain and heat have been irritating me, so I have been somewhat of a crusty bitch. Let's just say, "It's been a day." and just go with that. I hope y'all had a smooth day, and may your weekend plans be awesome. Stay safe. Stay cool. Be well. Be blessed. Most of all, be LOVED!!! Also, please remember if you a...

  Page 167 of 365. Happy Thor's Day Lovies. I, for one, am happy, it is slightly cooler than it has been for the past week or so. I am NOT one that could survive in the heat. I don't know, the only thing I find enjoyable about this season, is camping and fishing.  If you're stuck in the concrete jungle but a country person at heart, then this makes for a miserable time. It's this time of year, I want to pack up my stuff and hit the road...  I have a gypsy soul. I have such a thirst for wandering, it far precedes everything in my life (well, except for one person).  If it was in the slight way feasible, I'd pack up the sentimental shyt and, take to the road, only stopping to wherever life leads us. I ultimately want to live off the grid ~ life off the land.  For now, I am simply enjoying what is. The universe has been sending such odd signs lately, but ones that all lead to the same thing; the good and the tough ones. Yah, some days it feels like a serious kick t...

  Page 163 of 365. Good Afternoon Lovies. Sunday Funday is upon us... the weather is just a "RUDE" ass today... with humidex it is 45 C outside; and it is only 1:36pm my time!!! (Swamp ass anyone??? I am hoping by the end of this blurb I will have a title for it, otherwise, it will simply be what page we are in this 6th chapter of my current book. I feel that a lot of my blurbs lately have been about a lot of negative things happening in, and around my life. Today, I think maybe I should put  up something more uplifting and share some of the positives in my life. My health has it days, so that is nothing out of the norm. I have medical appointments all the time; I don't want to complain because doctors, specialists and surgeons are FINALLY on the same page, and there is hope for the future. Life has given me a refresher course on why I had such strong boundaries up... People tend to look at boundaries as a bad thing, when truthfully, they are only there to guide people to...

  Before I am going to write all of my own thoughts and feelings, I am going to share words that were spoken from one of our ancestors... some that I feel are pretty accurate for this moment in my life. "I cannot be a traitor, for I owe him NO allegiance..." For those of you who have been following my journey, you know the struggles I am having with family ~ both biological and adopted. I have never been one to shy away from my personal story; and I am NOT about to start now. I will continue to keep my policy of not revealing names, but that is ONLY out of the goodness of MY heart at this point... YOU NEED TO BE AWARE OF THAT!!! I OWE YOU NOTHING!!! There have been a lot of issues that have come forth with my biological family. One, as you know, my incubator ended up being quite a sinister woman. I don't loathe many people; but her, I can honestly put at the top of the list. I won't use the word "hate", because that takes effort and she is not worth it. It i...

  Page 162 of 365. Good Afternoon Lovies. I had to take a few days to myself before I could get behind the keyboard and attempt to put into words how my past week has been.  It has not been an easy one when it comes to emotions... my mental health took a serious dive; and my fibro has me in a major flare up... other than that, life is peaches!!! The first stab came when, (read my May 15th entry called "We Want Your Thoughts!!!") I called my dad for Father's Day., and as you can already guess... my mother picked up the phone. I kinda knew something was up because my dad would have definitely answered, knowing it was Father's Day, and I didn't want to talk to that wench. It was almost like I could hear the smirk on her face as she told me he was in bed, because he wasn't feeling good. My dumb ass asked about the surgery and what had they decided. She told me he had the surgery, and has been sick ever since. I snapped!!! I don't know why I ever expect anythin...

  Page 154 of 365. Hi Lovies. I know this blurb is going to cause conflict, kind of like the world outside our doors...  I am just going to voice my opinion on the subject.  I know people will agree and vehemently disagree with it; this is the great thing about our Charter of Rights and your Constitution...  My freedom of speech is still free, and I am going to continue using this platform, and my mouth to speak my mind. Let's dive into the riots happening in the United States of America... People are going to be on one side, or the other... I feel I am sort of neutral. So many people are against Donald Trump, that they cannot open their eyes and see the bigger picture.  (Please remember I am Canadian. I can openly admit that I may be way off with my views, but I am going to say people are very hypocritical if they are against him for what is happening in various cities in America, when he's not the first, nor the worst for doing the deportation of illegals). I ...

Page 151 of 365. Good Afternoon Lovies. Please accept my apologies, as I am running on very little to no sleep in the past 4 or 5 days now. My mind has been all over the place.  Anxiety got the best of me yesterday, and I could not go to my medical appointment... when this happens I get very disappointed in myself, Catch-22!!! Today, is a bit of a better day, although I desperately need to sleep... I did a stupid thing yesterday. I turned on the news channel; and immediately I was saying "WTF?" There is no way to explain how fucked up the world has become. People are being deported from the United States, by the tens of thousands, at a time. This is bringing on protests... and they are NOT peaceful ones. Trump has called in the Marines and the National Guard. It looks like there is going to be a very tense confrontation in Los Angeles, today or in the very near future. The debate people are having now, is whether Trump has the legal right to be calling the military in. After ...

  Page 147 of 365. Good Afternoon Lovies. It's FriYay, inspite medical appointments, it has been a decent day. The weather is great for those who like the heat. I'll just stick to my dungeon (LOL), I love my bedroom pitch black and ice cold. Anyways, let's get onto the topic I briefly wanted to talk about; I feel it already gets enough attention, and it sickens me!!!  I don't know the people's names, nor do I care to look them up; because honestly, they are NOT worth remembering. Anyone who has access to social media, or any ragmag (online), you would have read about these women who keep doing these challenges, trying to one up the other. It's truly disturbing!!! How the hell do any of these women think what they are doing is respectable??? One sleeping with 919 in one day; causing another woman determined to beat that record... she slept with 1057 men in 12 hours. What did the last guy do ~ grab a rope as he fell in??? If this is the new norm, I fear for the co...

  Page 145 of 365. Good Day Lovies. I hope those who love hot weather are enjoying today. I don't like the heat. I am 100% a winter (late autumn) baby.  Snow gives me joy... especially when it is freshly falling, and I am out in the country. It's like a blanket of serenity, silencing the outside world. PEACEFUL!!!  Today, it is "rude" outside... LOL I think it's around 34 degrees celcius (with the humidex). Gross!!! It has been a quiet day. I am doing a bit of reflecting on some events that just happened; kinda kicking myself in the ass over me having a big heart and once again getting the short end of the stick. I am not going to reveal names, but if they read this blog, they'll know I am speaking about them... I had felt guilty about a situation people were jammed in, and I did what I always do; I help in every way I can to make sure they don't suffer. I helped, in seeking justice for them too... then they did me dirty!!! I kept the situation in the back...

  Welcome to the 6th month of 2025. WOW, I cannot believe that we are already this far into the year of retribution!!! I am finding myself using words that are fairly foreign to me. I am not saying this as a bad thing, at all... the words "peace", "happy", "loved", "wanted" are not things I could usually associate with me nor my life; but now I can say them with confidence.  I can say them without fear of someone, or something trying to destroy it. I am THAT secure in what is happening in and around me, to say it out loud.  Fuck if we had a mountain around us (and I don't mean the pissant mole hill they call a "mountain" here in the Hammer, neither)... I am talking about Whistler Mountain... I'd be shouting it from the top. I have come to the point that I am at peace with things that I never had control over, but cried about for years and years, feeling guilty like somehow certain things fell on my shoulder, even as a child. It ...

  Page 142 of 365. Good Afternoon my Lovies. I hope it is a Sunday Funday for y'all. It has been a quiet day thus far, and I am enjoying it. I am just relaxing, as I am back to medical appointments tomorrow morning. I am fortunate enough that I only have two this week. I am kinda dreading the one tomorrow because it's with my family doctor and I have this gut feeling he is going to say I need to go see (yet again), another new specialist... fingers crossed, that I am wrong!!! I can't really complain about life these days. I spoke to my son the other day... I cannot wait to see him. Do you have any idea what it is like to not been able to hug your child (adult, or not) in 8 years??? It has put me in the best of moods, and I am not letting anything nor anyone take this feeling from me. I had a chance to speak with Darkling (my younger brother), for the first time in quite a while, I always love when we get time to talk. He is pretty busy with his paranormal business and I am ...

Wow, this is my third entry today. I had full intentions to chillax all day, alas the universe had other plans for me!!! I woke up at the crack ass of dawn. Why the hell would anyone wanna be up at that time on a Saturday??? Inquiring minds need to know?!! I went up to my sister's, shot the shyt for a while with her and Ma; came back downstairs; listening to tunes and relaxing. Unfortunately, that didn't last long... I didn't hear a thing until my roommate came into my room, informing that there are 12 fire trucks outside and the fire alarms are going off in the hallways. I know that I am supposed to stay in my apartment until a firefighter helps get me out of the building; but I had my roommate with me, so we took the stairs... it was only one floor. There were ashes falling in the stairwell... my apartment is beside the stairwell. We were stopped by three firefighters that told us it was safer for us to remain in the apartment, until further notice. We returned and went o...

Hi y'all. I will apologize now; this blurb is going to be a disturbing one. It's about a recent event that happened... something I am having a very difficult time wrapping my head around.  (It is not a personal story, nor of anyone I know; but fuck me... it hit deep. This world we live in is f*ckered BEYOND recognition!!!) Here it goes... Beth Martin, 28, travelled from the United Kingdom to Turkey with her husband Luke and their two young children. She began to feel sick already on the flight there, initially thinking it was simply food poisoning, but her health deteroriated quickly. Due to a language barrier, and lack of medical assistance, after 2 days, an ambulance DID come and take Beth to the hospital; by this point she was delirious... This is where the story gets "twisted", for lack of a better word.  For starters, her husband, Luke, was barred from seeing his wife. (By this time Beth had died, but due to the lack of an interpreter, Luke had no idea, and no on...

  Page 151 of 365. Good Morning Lovies. The weekend is upon us, I hope you all have a great one, in whatever you have planned. I think (well, more like HOPE), my day will just consist of writing and chillaxing. I didn't do a lot yesterday, but it took everything out of me. IYKYK I am not complaining. I got to spend time with my "purple". I did a lil shopping and I got a tattoo... MAN, I have missed my ink therapy!!! It was a real "trial and error" kinda of session though ~ in the sense.  I have been off my blood thinners for a little while now; but, I have been getting random bleeding and clots still.  I am beyond happy to say that I did not bleed at all during the tattoo, and miniscule after. I got some good news yesterday too; so all around Friday was a "bangin" day!!! For my regular readers, you know about the douchecanoe that did maintenance in the building I live in... well, he "resigned" yesterday. Obviously, I am going to continue to k...

I know... I am contradicting the picture, but who would I be, if I kept my mouth shut on such a sensitive subject???  I have never been one to shy away from voicing my opinion, and I sure as hell am not going to stop now... I was just scrolling through social media when I landed on an article that  BLEW MY MIND!!! I cannot find the link right now; if I do find it, I will add it to this blurb at a later time... basically, if you are Canadian, more specifically from Ontario, generally in Toronto, Ontario or the GTA (Greater Toronto Area)... this is something you should all be reading up on. HERE IS THE LINK: Black Mandated Shelters!!! (Read article here) There is an organization called B3... well city council has passed it, and now they are creating BLACK MANDATED HOMELESS SHELTERS, where everyone from the staff to the residents are Black or of African descent... People are sending in applications, and according to the government, they do not have to have any experience to run a...

  Page 148 of 365. Good Afternoon all you beautiful souls. I hope you're having a great Wetnesday (yah, I KNOW I spelled it wrong... it's been rainy all day, felt fitting)!!! I know it is only Wednesday, but I have been having a bit of a "go" since Thursday last week.  I had been trying to keep it to myself, but I tend to share with my person (my purple) all of my woes... God, he sure has some strong shoulders for all that I spew; especially if I spit venom. I am just grateful that, for the most part, he has known me long enough to know, it isn't directed at him. He is my saving grace when I am in the depths of my dispair. I had a tough time the past few days because my "livelihood" was left in the hands of someone who was very frivolous with it. My sanity was hanging by a thread, which led to a series of unfortunate events... Insecurities and other bullshit that was past history, reared its ugly head, giving me pause and placing me in a vulnerable place...

Page 145 of 365.  Good Afternoon Lovies. How goes it??? I am just in a chillaxed mood today. "In the zone", so to speak... I got up at a decent time. I fall asleep at a decent hour every night, even if I wake up around the witching hour and up for an hour or so, I sleep again for a few hours and feel completely rested in the morn. Today was no different. I felt pretty content going to sleep last night, and the feeling continued into today... at least for most of it. I decided, today I was going to make a decent meal. The other day, the roommates wanted home-made (as if there is any other, in this house) Greek food. So on Thor's Day I made souvlaki and Greek potatoes. Friday ended up being a shit show of sorts, and we ended up going out to a restaurant for dinner... this is rare, trust me. I am not a people person... Social anxiety is a real struggle!!! Friday night was British/Scottish for me... Fish & Chips, I didn't have mushy peas though (I think peas are vile....

Page 141 of 365 Good afternoon Lovies. It's a dreary day outside; I still hope you are all having a good one. I sat here last night, getting kinda stuck in there... Yah, one of those kind of nights. I don't feel it was such a bad thing... it was more of a recognition of personal growth, and being at peace with certain things and people. I used to be such a bitter bitch, and would take a lot of things very personal. I couldn't wait for karma to do its thang.. What life has truly taught me is things fall into place when they are meant to. I am trying to accept that my parents are simply who they are, and it is okay if I don't stay in regular contact with them. The battle has been long enough. My dad is sick, my mother isn't doing great... I struggle with myconscience about that, so I will TRY to stay in some form of contact; but I am going to listen to someone who knows me (probably better than I know myself)... I can't keep trying to get them to love me.  What is...

Hey y'all. Sorry, I am stuck in my head, this may be an "all over the place" sort of blurb. I know this one is going to be a bit of a touchy subject; but please know this is coming from a good space... I am hearing A LOT, how people are really wanting a partner/significant other (SO).  I am watching all too often people jumping at whatever is "served up to them", feeling they'd rather have anyone over what they truly deserve.  Doing this is only leading to deeper heartache. TRUST, I am speaking from personal experience. I've had a few relationships in my life, and if I look at them chronologically, you can really see where I was at mentally. I won't say they were necessarily mistakes BUT I can certainly say each one was a lesson!!! It wasn't until my last relationhip (which ended in the beginning of 2023), that I had made a vow to myself I would work on me, giving it at LEAST 13 months before I even thought about dating anyone again. I wanted to ...

Page 139 of 365.  Good Afternoon Lovies. It's the last day of Victoria weekend here in Canada, back to the grind tomorrow for most.I guess for some it sucked because it rained a few times (even some wicked storms), hope you all stayed dry and don't get sick from it. Maybe it comes with age; maybe it comes with personal experiences; but I simply could care less about these long weekends, or any holiday really!!! The summer long weekends usually mean, heavy drinking, getting high, and doing stupid shyt. Since I wasn't a drinker nor do any (street) drugs, I had the "joy" of dealing with belligerent and vile behaviour from at least a few. We ALL know there are a few in every bunch Nah, my ideal long weekend consists of being out in the woods, by a lake... fishing during the day and sitting by a fire later at night... becoming one with nature; listening to the loons, the wolves and various other creatures of the night. To me, that is heaven. Now if people are going to ...

  Hey y'all. I felt it important to do a mental health check in. I know everyone deals with mental health in one form or another.  As you know, I am very outspoken about my own personal journey; and I jope to continue to do so. If my experiences can help even one person understand that they are not alone... than I am grateful!!!! (Before I go down this path, please remember I do NOT talk about others struggles on here. Their journey is theirs, and it is their story to tell... not mine!!!) This past week, probably two weeks have been pretty heavy. I have been spending a lot of time in my room, which I tend to make into a dungeon. Cool, dark and therapeutic music... which can range from heavy metal to thunderstorms to frequency therapy to Ava Satanas (Dark Monastery Gregoriam Chants). Either way, I have been noticing I have started isolating myself and been trying to shake out whatever inner demons are surfacing. Some of you may not know this about me, but I have had bouts of de...